I haven't written any updates in a while. Mostly because there hasn't been much to update on. In general life is pretty hectic, but we are having fun and pressing on towards the goals we believe God has given us.
Obviously, adoption is one of those goals! I have to be honest; after the disruption of our twins adoption I began to question if this was really the case for us. Is this really what God wants us to be pursuing? Maybe we are supposed to be involved in another way? I actually asked the "If God is truly good..." question. There has been a lot of soul searching, praying, questioning, crying, wondering, maybe even a little yelling and an occasional pity party. But at the end of the day, this calling is clear.
There are birth mothers who are in a myriad of situations all over this country. These brave women are making one of the hardest decisions of their life, out of LOVE for the life growing inside them. Sometimes they have a support system of friends or family who love them through this decision. Sometimes they are completely alone. Either way, they have chosen LIFE for their baby. For whatever reasons they choose to place their baby, it's not an easy decision. Our job is to show love to these ladies, no matter their circumstances. No matter the pain we experience by choosing to love them. I mean, how many times do we hurt Jesus, yet he loves us...unconditionally. The bible says "By this shall all me know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another." Love. I can't say I'm always good at this, but The Lord is working on me :) At the end of the day if I speak with a birth mother she should (and hopefully does!) feel exactly that from me.
And these women, who have every right in the world to CHOOSE to place their babies, are going to birth precious, innocent little ones who need parents to love them unconditionally. To provide a home full of safety, security, love, and hope. Hopefully a family who will do what they can to cultivate a healthy relationship between child and birth parents.
There are couples, like ours, who have a great desire to grow their family. Some because they cannot have biological children, some because they simply desire to adopt. Either way, the extreme love they (we) have for these momma's and their babies is intense. And in the end we all want these children to grow up knowing and experiencing this love first hand.
This is enough for me to know that we have been called to grow our family through adoption. The ups and downs, the weight of waiting day in and out, the hope and disappointment, the joy and pain. Adoption is beautiful and tragic, but our God redeems and restores. We are to be a vessel for Him to do just that.
So we press on, and we keep waiting, and we keep choosing to love from afar until the day we are chosen by a birth mother and can love up close.
